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How to help someone with anger issues?

When someone has trouble processing their anger or becomes harmful or destructive when angry, they may have anger management issues. It’s normal to express anger in healthy ways. However, harmful behaviors resulting from uncontrolled angry outbursts can damage relationships. If a friend or a family member has anger issues or frequently acts out of control, you can help them learn how to cope with anger.

How to Know When Help is Needed

Anger management issues can stem from a variety of underlying problems. Issues can happen when someone has trouble communicating.

When someone has anger problems, they may have difficulty regulating their anger’s severity, which often causes them to act out destructively. Other symptoms that may indicate the need for anger management counseling include:

  • Frequent anger and irritability with themselves or others, or having an anger attack over small things
  • Getting tense or angry, even showing aggressive behavior, for no discernable reason
  • Hurting family members, friends, or themselves (emotionally, physically, or verbally), or holding grudges and plotting revenge
  • Intolerance of others and the mistakes made by other people
  • Aggressive and/or violent behavior toward other people or their self
  • Sullen moods, sulking or getting mad over past events

What Causes Anger Issues?

Stress, impatience, and feeling underappreciated, overwhelmed, or victimized are common triggers that normally cause people to feel angry. Underlying factors that affect the ways people exhibit and deal with anger are:

  • Growing up in an environment where angry outbursts, having to suppress feelings or witnessing others in the home with anger problems, substance abuse, or other mental illness
  • Past trauma, such as abuse or bullying
  • An inability to express yourself

Anger is also one of the common symptoms of depression. Research suggests that depression and anger are closely linked due to an imbalance of neurochemicals in the brain that regulate emotion and mood. A person with depression may exhibit signs of anger such as hostility, irritability, or rapid and intense explosive episodes. They may also display signs of anger turned inward by engaging in negative self-talk or self-destructive behaviors.

How to Calm Someone With Anger Issues

If you recognize a friend or loved one having trouble regulating their emotions or their angry behavior has led to social, work, or problems at home, getting information from therapists at Insight Therapy Solutions can help.

If you want to help someone with anger issues and depression, encourage them to seek help from a mental health professional. Learning how to help someone with anger issues calm down when you’re in a relationship with that person can improve both of your lives.

Other steps to take are staying calm, setting boundaries, and giving them space to get their feelings out. Help them identify the reasons behind their emotions, and let them know it’s okay to feel them.

Don’t confront an angry person. If you feel unsafe, have an escape plan, and call the police if necessary. If you believe a person has a major depressive disorder, advise them to seek professional help.

Where to Get Help

If their anger controls you or someone you know, the skilled clinicians at Insight Therapy Solutions can help. Several therapies are used to treat anger management problems, and there are support groups for those suffering from these issues and their friends and families.

Working with one of our counselors can create positive changes in your life. They can help someone you love to understand their anger through increasing self-awareness and learning how to control their impulses through therapy, relaxation techniques, deep breathing, and meditation to help them regain control.


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